The Vow by B. E. Baker

Author:B. E. Baker [Baker, B. E.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Purple Puppy Publishing

16

Donna

I’m the kind of person who feels guilty when I kill a cockroach. I recognize that it’s dumb—but guilt just doesn’t listen to reason. I don’t want big, nasty bugs in my house, and I know my best bet is to squish it, but after I do? I feel terrible for having done it.

Don’t even get me started on how bad I feel about throwing away things I’m not going to use.

Sometimes I donate things I know no one will want, just so I don’t have to suffer through the emotional guilt of thinking it’s going in the trash. I blame my mother. She anthropocentrized everything. My stuffed animals fell off the bed keeping me safe from monsters. My pencil was sad when I didn’t use it. Toys that were left in the corner and never used were pariahs. The Toy Story movies just exacerbated a problem I already had.

My brother Patrick does not struggle with this kind of thing at all. To him, it’s simple. Our father was not a nice man, and now he’s even worse. He yelled a lot, he hit us often, and he never made us feel loved. Now that Dad’s mind has checked out for the vast majority of the time he’s awake, Patrick really has no patience with him.

Which is why, when he gets sick and becomes even worse to manage than usual, Patrick feels no remorse about squashing the cockroach. “No.” He folds his arms.

“I’m just asking you to help me load him in the car,” I say. “Let Aiden stay with you for a few hours. I’ll take Dad to the hospital, and I’ll sit with him, and I’ll file whatever forms they need. He has Medicare, so it won’t cost much.”

“You said he’s running a fever, and he’s more delirious than usual.”

“And he screams whenever he goes to the bathroom,” I say. “Something’s definitely wrong.”

“It’s either something he’ll get over on his own, in which case I shouldn’t have to be involved, or—”

Dad starts shouting right then, as if to make his point.

“See?”

Patrick frowns. “He’s doing this a lot?”

“For more than an hour, every few minutes.” Aiden covers his ears.

“I can’t just sit here.”

“If it hurts when he goes to the bathroom, it’s either a stomach bug or—”

“It’s when he pees,” I clarify. I absolutely hate that Dad needs help to go to the bathroom, but helping him go is much less depressing than changing his diaper. I do that every morning already. I have no desire to do it all day long.

“Then it’s definitely a urinary tract infection. I heard the diapers cause those sometimes.”

Aging is not for the weak. “A few antibiotics will clear it up,” I say. “I’ll go grab my keys.”

“No.”

“Excuse me?”

Patrick shifts, blocking me from walking into my small kitchen. “You won’t take him anywhere.”

I shove him, but he doesn’t budge. “Seriously, Patrick, move.”

His chest swells and his feet widen, as if he’s expecting me to rush him or something.

“If we do nothing and you’re right, this will become a kidney infection.

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